If you stand for nothing, you will fall for anything.

So as we were sharing stories about our kids this morning at work, over coffee one of the ladies said 'have any of you ever heard of a bu-thigh (buh-thigh)?' We all looked at each other, our brains churning trying to recall if the doctors ever mentioned an issue with a bu-thigh or trying to determine if it was some new crazy virus. In our morning haze, we all came up blank.....blank, and still blank. Well, apparently it is alot like cankles - you know the cross between your calf and ankles. I know I had them twice, one with each kid. No one could tell where my calf stopped and my ankle began. And today I learned that I have a bu-thigh as well. This is where your butt meets your thigh and no one call tell where one ends and one begins. ahem.....sigh......ahem. As side from being a little depressed about the conversation, and not feeling like this is a term I ever really wanted to learn I gave a little thought to my back-side. Which folks is in sad shape - no need to go ahead ...

So by now everyone has heard that Disney is going to refund anyone who bought a baby Einstein video between 2000 and 2005; which by the way would be a ton of people I know - Including myself. Of course we bought the video's, we watched them - hello bold colors, random movements and silly sounds. My household rather enjoyed them, my son found them to be interesting and they did keep him occupied for a good 10 to 20 minutes - which is mommy world, equals relief. Hell, I would pop in Porky's if I thought it would give me 10 to 20 minutes of relief during the baby, toddler stage. As a consumer, as a parent and as a semi-level headed adult, I never imagined that the videos would actually make my child smarter or create the next Einstein. I found them to be a better option then the Ed, Edd and Eddy cartoon their father insisted on watching. I found that 8 years ago I could tolerate the videos better than Barney the big purple turd. Because during those day, no I did luv barney...

I swear I am married to a morphed form of Martha Stewart and Ed Bundy. I refer to Tuesday as our hell days, these are the days when Pyper has gymnastics and Rylan has football - we run around like idiots. Well this past Tuesday, we were also at the hospital with Lance's dad. So I decided to put on my mom pants and be the one who would run the kids around, normally I am at work and Lance gets it all done. I left the hospital in enough time to go home and catch a quick half hour nap prior to picking up the kids from the sitters. I managed to convince myself that since Rylan wasn't off the bus yet, I could go home and make nice with my couch, open my windows, say a few prayers and attempt to unwind. That lasted like a milla-second. I get the kids, get home and start the Tuesday scramble......start Rylan's homework, find the uniform, find the football crap, feed the kids, pack snacks, pack chairs, pack a cooler, pack Pypers mystery bag of stuff to do for 2 hrs of football p...

Just in case you were wondering I am ready for 2009 to be OVER. It has seemed like the year from hell. Yes, folks...H.E.L.L Lets run thru the short laundry list -recession, has kicked our arse, and drained our savings. -Rylan's surgery, need I say more. *he is a total rock starr, and we are glad it is over. -family, friends, pressure, work ect.; my way of being generic. Here are some most recent events that continue to support my thought that 2009 has sucked. A week ago we got a call that Lance's mom was in the ICU - in Texas. Can we say hello emotional overdrive. We did not hope on a plan and make our way to Texas, we waded thru phone calls and updates. Well actually he took them all, and only dispensed the information after hours of prying and begging. After a week or so it has been determined that she will need oxygen on a full time basis and over all is pretty healthy. Whew! In the back of my mind my thoughts were as follows ' this was the only year, in 8 years th...

Okay, as much as I hate to accept it, we are in sleep hell. Pyper STILL does not sleep all night. She does not go to bed on her own, she falls asleep on the couch with me, then I carry her to her bed. Before I get a bunch of emails about it all, let me just state, that I know I am an enabler. I honestly have not worked on trying to get her to go to bed in her own bed - I just let her lay next to me on the couch until she is snoring. She is such a touchy child, she will feel and twist my hair until her it is wound up tight and knotted up to my scalp. Once she even got her fat little sausage fingers wrapped up in my hair the tip of her finger turned blue. If she hurts me, and I ask her to keep her fingers out of my hair then she will move on to her own. Wrapping and twisting until her little eyes are closed. Prior to bed time I am too wrapped up in wanting to lay in the couch and veg out in front of the TV that I honestly have not made putting her in her own bed a priority. I can ow...

Okay folks flu season is upon us...and the damn H1N1 is all over the place. The flu basically sucks anyway, without this nonsense. My work and my doctor are pushing the vaccine - I am dead set against getting it. I have never gotten the flu shot, nor have my kids. But on the flip side, it could kick our arse or kill my babies. We just got a note from our football team that a kid has been diagnosed w/ the swine flu - a kid that was sickly looking during Sat's game. So in essence we have all been exposed to it and I am bit freaked out. But not freaked out enough to shoot the crap in their arm or up their nose. But honestly I am damn scared! Someone throw me a bone - what are you doing in your household? Is anyone else torn? I met a mom during football who said her son just got over the swine flu last week - his fever was 105. OMG! 105, I almost puked right there. She said it was scary, her son lost 7 lbs - but stayed home and she managed it. I am finding it difficult to imagine P...

men...grrr. men. or at least my husband. The double standard that floats around my house makes me crazy, bonkers - crazy. So this weekend I am going on a 'girls' only trip. I will be leaving Sat morning coming back Sunday. Hello, like 24 hours - no big deal. The entire week he has been making snide comments about how much I get to get out, ect. Sure he is half ass jealous - but for REAL dude; keep it. Last night he started with the whole 'you know you are going to miss the football game.' I knodded in agreement. then he stated 'well, what about Pyper? What am I suppose to do with her?' My reply ' the same damn thing I would do with her at the game - watch her!'. I have yet to tell him that I work happy hour planned for next Wed, I am not ready to catch hell for that one. I need to get thru this Sat first. But for real, if one of his friends calls and wants him to go - he goes. No worries, no what about the kids ect. Plus in Nov he is going to leave for a...

I have been absent lately, and not from lack of things to say, just a lack of how to say it all - and it not come back to either bite me in the arse, or regret how I decided to communicate it all. I am waiting for all of the muck to work its way out of my head, waiting for a little relief, waiting for the full moon that seems to have driven everyone out of their 'effing mind to get back to half cocked rather than full. It seems like the tides, currents and moon have all aliened to throw me curve ball, after curve ball and it has frankly sucked. I feel like a i am walking around with a damn target on my head, and both of my middle fingers are in the up-right position. Because these days I frankly don't care. Folks, that is bad place to be...... I am not one that 'waits' well. I am normally a fixer, normally gett-er done kind of person. But some of the issues are not mine to fix, others came out of the blue because people are CRAZY. (reminds me of that song 'god is gr...