Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Moving right along..

Okay, now that EVERYONE is familiar with my husband and his antics - I will move on.

*But before I move on, I must admit that to this date he does not see anything wrong with what transpired last Friday night.
I did see the Mayor today, during a meeting with the business owners and he was pleasant. No harm done - yet.
I keep the video stream on my desk-top - it keeps me smiling, when my day gets a bit tough.

Yesterday, Lance had to pay an electrician / heating & cooling guy to replace our thermostat. The thermostat would be fine, had he not flung it across the room a week earlier. One of his pet-peeves is listening to the heater / air conditioner kick on. He stops what he is doing to listen to them kick on and ensure that 'everything sounds right'.
I look at him sideways 'what the hell does alright sound like - exactly?'
As usual he ignores me....well last week the heater did not kick on. Lance KNEW it was the thermostat, he messed with that damn thing for two days straight. Once he 'thought' he got it fixed, it would sound funny.
Then one day next week the digital thermostat had no numbers on the face, it was dead. Lance tried everything he could to get it to come back to life.
He wiggled it, it banged it, he cursed it, he walked away and then came back for more. Only this time he was going to show the Thermostat who was boss, this time he REALLY wiggled it, banged it, and CURSED it. Rather than walking away, he ripped it off the wall.
(Very mature)
So for two days our house was barely 60 degrees, the kids slept in their winter sleepers with extra covers.
I overhear Lance talking to one of his friends about the thermostat, and I hear Lance state ' it has a battery?' I whip my head around and glare at him 'are you kidding me, you ripped the damn thing off the wall, and all you needed to to was change the battery?'
Lance assures me that it did not need a battery, it HAD to be something else.
I look at him ' well, now it is clearly something else - because the thermostat won't even stay on the wall and there are wires hanging out. Today it is SOMETHING else, yesterday it was the battery. IDIOT.' ( i use the term lovingly).
He called the heating and cooling guy, the guy came by yesterday - replaced the thermostat and we paid for a maintenance program.
The guy leaves and Lance states ' I could have done that! It was just two wires and a few screws.'
Me ' Of course you could have. Yes, dear' (yes, I am being sarcastic). And so the day goes on, only now the DePew family is a bit warmer...and/or cooler. Because I have turned the air on - ha!

*I have changed my format - so now you guys can see my new post immed. Let me know if you like the change.
Secondly, I became a member of the STL Bloggers Guild. See over to the right side- it will take you to the website for the Guild.

Monday, April 28, 2008

Chinese Chicken..

Last Friday night my work had an 'interactive dinner', this was a meet the new people dinner. We have a new Mayor and other elected officials - basically my boss.
I had struggled all week with whether or not to bring Lance with me...seriously. As the story continues you will know why!!
Bottom line, I should have left him at home.
The happy hour started at 6pm, we did not arrive until 6:30. We are the youngest people in the room by at least 15 to 20 years. It was a casual dinner, and there are people in coats & ties. Damn! I wore bluejeans, heels and a nice top. Lance wore green khakis, and a polo - all in all we were fine. I really expected some of the people to dress down a bit more. I will know better next time.
So we mingled a bit and then sat down at dinner. I sat Lance next to the Park & Rec director - this was decided before we even arrived. I figured Lance would be safe there.
There were approx. 40 people at this dinner and the Mayor's wife sits on the other side of me.
*Out of all of the seats in the room, they sit next to me. god must be punishing me.
The Mayor asked Lance ' What do you do?'
Lance responds ' I am a low-voltage electrician.'
Mayor ' as opposed to a high-voltage? ha!ha!.
Lance ' hardy, hardy. '
I kick Lance under the table, and instruct him to put food in his mouth. He is drinking beer and I am drinking red wine. The first lady is drinking wine as well.
The first lady comments how her biggest vice is drinking wine. I begin to relax. We make it thru dinner without too much drama.
As dinner concludes, Lance makes his way to the bar to smoke (and try to catch the game). A few of us decide to stay after dinner and sit at the bar. This group includes the Mayor and his wife. Now Lance has moved on to drinking dirty martini's. We are there about an hour and a half when the Mayor makes his way to the other side of Lance, and they begin talking.
I keep chatting with co-workers, but I keep one ear on Lance and his conversation with the Mayor. I hear the conversation turn to a WalMart discussion, unions etc.
Lance is voicing his over-bearing opinion about unions and walmart, and the Mayor seems to be taking it in stride.
Mind you the Mayor is a retired sales man for 3M - he worked there for 35 years. He is savvy, and has a total sales man approach. He is getting a kick out of Lance, he is enjoying getting him worked up.
Someone orders some appetizers and the Mayor picks up the platter brings it by Lance's face and makes him an offer ' would you like some Chinese Chicken?'
Lance response ' you cock-sucker. you are totally busting my balls.'
I stop dead in my tracks, turn around and I am mortified. I look at Lance ' did you just call MY BOSS a cocksucker?'
Lance does not look phased, ' yeah, he is totally busting my balls. did you hear him offer me Chinese chicken?'
I looked at Lance ' I don't care if he asked you to lick his shoes, you cannot talk like that.'
I look over at my co-workers who are rolling on the floor. I apologize to the Mayor, who is grinning. I apologize to his wife, says to think nothing of it.
I comment ' just put my pink slip in the mail'.

I hear Lance say to the Mayor ' those office people are so damn touche, you don't care do you?'
*What would the Mayor say to that really?
The Mayor seems amused by Lance and my reaction. I tell Lance to finish his drink we are leaving. He tells me to chill out, and give him some time - him and the Mayor are talking.
Nope, discussion over! I pack us up and head home - reeling over the events.
Lance is amused with himself, I am mortified.
Today I walk into the office with snickers and giggles from the staff - word travels fast.
Note to self - *husband is not ALLOWED in PUBLIC.

*So I get this later this afternoon from an officer with a note 'guess which one is your husband.'
I laughed so hard I cried at this video. ENJOY.

video

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

WPA....

WPA is the Webkinz Protection Agency (for those of you that did not know!).

Last night Rylan informs us that he cannot locate his library book, and we will be charged $16.00 unless it is returned.
Lance informs Rylan that he must return one of his Webkins in order to pay for it, since he was the one that mis-placed it.
Rylan without even blinking an eye responds, ' I already, took the tag off of it; and the store won't take it back.'
Rylan glances around the table, rather proud of himself.
Lance responds 'we will just take it to the WPA'.
I shoot a look at Lance, and Rylan whips his head around 'the what? What is the WPA?'
Lance very calmly ' the Webkinz Protection Agency. This is the place where people can drop off their Webkins, when the store won't take them back. They are then placed up for adoption.'
*By now Lance looks very pleased with himself. And I smile back at him, very impressed.
Rylan responds " I have never heard or seen such a place. Besides who will take care of my webkin, once I decide which one to give up?''
Lance clearly still on mark responds ' the place is off of HWY 40, and since the HWY is closed they are having some difficulty getting the webkinz dropped off. We can just mail it to them, and them with the code / password and they will take care of everything from there.'
Rylan is beginning to look bewildered. He looks at me for support, I hide my face in my glass of wine to shield my smile, and giggle. I cough so I don't laugh out loud.
Rylan then states ' perhaps, I could 'work' it off. I really want to keep all 3 of my webkinz. '
So there you have it folks the WPA - we have set up a protection agency for the webkinz, and apparently it works better than taking video games away in our house hold.

Two other light things.
1) Lance drove his fathers pink Cadillac to work today. You know the mauve ones that were popular in the 90's. Well, we took his father to the airport last week, and are keeping his car until he returns next weekend. Lance in his ball-cap, t-shirt and overhauls - hopped in the pink cadd'y today. ha!!! *mind you, he works construction - he normally drives a truck. Today he looks like white pimp from hoozier vill'. That is how we ride in the Jeffo.

2) Rylan was fitted for his "W" appliance today at the ortho. He was a complete champ! I am so impressed with him. This sets us one step closer to a bone graph (which scares the CRAP out of me), but one thing at a time. He is excited to have this thing in his mouth, and feels very special with it. Now,we have metal and a mo-hawk.

On the darker side -
Pyper SUCKS! someone help me....PLEASE. That child was up from 2:30am until 5am this morning whining for a milk cup, whining to get up and lay on the couch. I REFUSE to get her a milk cup, so I got her water. IF (really big IF), she was really thirsty should would drink the water. She did not drink the water, rather she screamed and threw a fit. She is programmed to 'think' she needs milk at 2:30. I am trying to break the habit and STILL trying to get her to sleep all night. She is going to break me, and perhaps even Lance.
How do people REALLY get their kids to sleep all night?
We have structure, she takes a bath, eats, and then it is bedtime. Always at 8:30, she goes to bed fine. Once in bed she is up at 11:30 asking to get in my bed, and by 2:30 she is asking for milk. Like clock work.
Now here is the kicker - if I give her the damn milk at 2:30, she will go right to sleep, no problem. I know you are thinking, 'she must be hungry'. No, she eats dinner - she is a great eater.
Therefore by process of elimination she has been deemed 'the devil child'. The child that won't shut-up, the child that is going to KILL me. How can I love this child so much and not stand her at the same time??? Perhaps she is a vampire, and rather than sucking my blood, she is going to cause wrinles, bags and bald spots (because she pulls at my hair all night too). HELP!

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

At the Park....










So this past weekend we made our way down to the Soulard Market. My sister met us with her 4 kids as well.
From the top -
Grant, the blonde hair little boy...who at 2 yrs old is not so little. He is shy at times, but don't be fooled - he is rowdy, rough and tumble. The other day he looked at me and said ' I wike u.' My heart melted, we are making strides.

August, who is 3 right now, but will be 4 in May. She is my sisters challenging personality. She is as chatty and as stubborn as they come. She also seems to be the most independent of all of the kids.

Paige (Adrienne), the oldest of the four children. She a little mamma in the making. Although she did beg her mother not to have any more children after they had August -ha! She is sassy at almost 9 yrs old. She is witty, smart and at times shy until she feels comfortable. She is the most comfortable around her siblings and cousins. She is NOT boy crazy, but loves Hannah Montana - can you tell. We love the hat.

Payton (Alexandria), she is 6 and in the first grade. She is boy crazy, has a soft smile that will melt your heart, and is built like me and my sister. She is the most like my sister out of all of her kids. My sister looked just like her as a child. Payton, is the lovely kid and has a laugh that will make you smile in a moments notice.

*These children have my heart, and we love to have them around.





Here is Rylan hanging out at the park.

And Pyper playing on in the tube. I love to see my kids smile.






Here is Pyper eating an orange on the patio. Fresh fruit and veggies are a must when we visit the Market.






This is Rylan hanging out by the playground. In his new hat from the Market.


This is glimpse into a typical spring / summer saturday for us.....

Monday, April 21, 2008

Spring & Sneezing...

Excuse me while I blow snot everywhere, sound like I have a frog in my throat, my head is pounding, my eyes are watering and I feel like crap. I am not sure which makes me feel worse, the allergies that have creeped up on me since my late 20's or the medicine that I need to take.
The medicine makes me 'twitchy', it puts me in overdrive and on edge.

On the other hand the pressure in my head, makes me unable to function.

Damn the spring time. I was literally out back yesterday sweeping the deck, it was a great spring day, Lance as mowing the lawn, the kids were playing and then suddenly it hit me like a ton of bricks. It being the pressure, the eyes watering, the agony in my head. I laid down on the porch yesterday and wanted to die.
Pyper walked by pushed me a bit and says 'mommy get up, mommy up.' I rolled over and looked at her with weary eyes...'not now honey, I sick.'

Rylan slept on the couch for 4 hours yesterday, the weather change puts him in a whirlwind as well. All of the stuff in the air sticks to the roof of his mouth and his sinus's since they are basically open from this clefting.

Speaking of Rylan we have been seeing an orthodontist for the last two weeks in preparation of a new applicance for him. He gets it put on this Wed, it is a 'W' applicance that is suppose to widen his palate and push is jaw forward - he will have braces by late summer. He is anxious about the appliance, I will need to keep alot of ice cream on hand to sooth his hurt soul this week. His mouth will be sore for a few days.

Pyper is doing well, she too is struggling with the weather change. We are running humidifiers, wearing vicks vapor rub and taking runny nose medicine on a regular basis. She is still sleeping with us every night she gets in bed around midnight. She is potty training like a champ, however she does not want to keep her clothes on. Yesterday, she was down the street a bit (we live on dead end), and she took all of her clothes off before I could get to her.

On a happy note. Lance and I are going to NYC this July without any kids. I am SO excited. His niece moved to Long Island 6 mths ago, has house and her roommates are gone the entire month of July. Plus, I have family there as well. My cousin, who use to a drummer for Anthrax, lives in NYC. I think he is now working on movies / mini-series. I have been struggling with whether or not to go, then I said 'the hell with it', we are going. I booked the tickets last week. We are going for 3 nights and 4 days. We have decided to take the kids to Texas over Thanksgiving rather than this summer - it will just be too damn hot to enjoy a trip this summer with the kids. So we will plan a few local fun things to do with them - day camp, a float trip, Six Flags etc.

*I may need to get an 'apartment' to express how I am feeling about my sister and the things going on her in life. Plus, I my best friend has some really personal / deep issues going on, and it might be helpful to lay it all out there. I will keep you posted it I set up residence in the pink housing unit. I am feeling really hindered and sufficated by it all.

Lastly, I am so bummed that I missed out on this past weekend blogger get together at the Atomic Cowboy..
I am nervous about meeting everyone, but anxious too. I feel like I know so many of you guys already. I PROMISE not to miss the next one. I could not make it this time, due to the fact that I was out of town, and then Lance had plans to go see the UFC fight with some friends.

I will post photos soon of our Sat afternoon out at the Soulard Market. We spent 4 hours down there on Saturday, strolling the market, buying fresh produce and playing on the play ground. That area really has our heart and soul. Even Lance commented -'I really like it down here, I could live here.' I just sighed 'yeah, me too.'.

Okay, one more thing. I did NOT feel the earthquake. I was in Lake of the Ozarks, and sleeping off my chocolate martini's from the night before. I hope everyone is safe and sound.
Signing off for now.......I have to blow my nose, wipe my eyes and curse mother nature.

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Moving on?

So I spent last night at my sisters home, again. I went over after I got home from work. I picked up Pyper, kissed my husband and son - and went to my sisters.
She will tell you she is 'fine', she will tell you she does not need anything. But. I am her sister and I know better. I am the one person who can walk in the room and not have to say a word, yet we have said everything. All she needed was for me to be around, and for me to give her a hug. She is 'fine' for all intensive purposes. She has to be, her life still has to go on, she still has 4 young kids who need her. But she is not *fine*, she is just going thru the motions, and half ass at that. She did not shower for two days. Mind you, she showers AND shaves everyday.
It will be a long road for her and her husband, they both lost someone near and dear to them.
I won't insult her with words of comfort or tell her everything will be okay. At this point, I don't know that it will. Regardless, I will be there.

But, here is where I am struggling. I have had my annual conference scheduled now for three months, and I have to leave tomorrow to go out of town. I am going to the lake of the ozarks, staying at the four seasons resort. The viewing is tomorrow and the funeral is the next day. I have decided not to cancel my conference plans. Part of me feels like a smuck. The other part of me knows that I will be useless at the viewing / funeral anyway.
Misty,has already said she is staying for the entire 6 hours of the viewing to stay by her friends side. The reality of it is, I would probably only show up for a 1/2 hour anyway and then go home. The reality of it is, I wouldn't go to the funeral - I think those are personal, and I liked the guy, and we meet on several occasions, but we were not deep friends. Nor are me and his wife. I know I am making the right decision....so, why does it feel so bad?
I have images of my sister really needing me, and I will be out of town. Then, I think -she has a husband to lean on, and they probably really need each other.
*I might just be in the way.
ugh.
As much as I am looking forward to getting away, and sleeping all night, and getting a massage...I am troubled by the things I am leaving at home. My sister, Pyper fighting allergies, Lance actually handling things for two nights and three days. I hope i can let go of these issues and just relax. Although, I know how I am, and that is not likely.......
I look so forward to going away, I have such grand ideas about what I am going to do with my time, and then I spend it thinking about home. Is this normal?

I know that Lance can keep the kids for a few days, but I still worry that when I am gone is when something will happen.......I worry he won't get up in the middle of the night with Pyper, or give her the medicine, or be able to comfort her during one of her two year old fits. But he is her dad, he really wants what is best for her. I am sure on hour in to the 'get to know each other' reception ( a few cosmo's later), I will feel fine. *

I will actually get to shower, shave, sleep alone, sleep all night, and not have to share a bed - what the hell am I b*tching about? Someone should slap me right now! I have a two bedroom condo if anyone cares to join me :).............

Monday, April 14, 2008

One moment changes everything.....

I have written several times about my sister and her 'out-of-control' state. Well, I am saddened to say that it has caught up with her.....or better yet her friend.
In an instant her life was turned up side down. As usual her and her friend Angie went out this weekend. They went out Friday and Saturday night and threw caution to the wind, and acted like fools. Drinking, driving and acting as if they were untouchable.
All the while their husbands were hanging out together watching their children. Apparently, their husbands were at home drinking as well. Watching 5 kids and drinking.
Misty (my sister) was passed out by the time she made it home, so she went straight to bed - while her husband was apparently outside puking.
Angie found her husband asleep (passed-out) and her two year old daughter up and around. Angie was enraged, and drove her and the daughter home. Told her husband "Steve (changed name to protect identity)' that she had, had enough and that his bags would be packed. This would be the last time she saw her husband. These would be the last words she says to her husband. And for that I am sorry.

I get home from church yesterday, bring the kids inside, and Lance tells me to come into the garage 'we need to talk'. This struck me as odd, Lance NEVER pulls me aside. I thought he was going to tell me that he spend alot of money or something. He did look serious, he had tears in his eyes. He states ' your mother called while you were at church, and Misty found 'Steve' dead this morning'. The color drained out of my face, 'no, no.....oh! no. I gotta go, I have to get to Misty's.'
Lance nods his head, he takes care of the kids and head over to my sisters.
*Damn-it, I just spoke with her about being so damn stupid... this could have been anyone of them. I am so angry at their STUPID choices.
Now a two year old little girl will grow up without a dad, her friend is a single mom and my sister will be haunted for the rest of her life at the site of having to stay with the body until the ambulance arrived.
Misty found found the body. They searched for a couple of hours, then Misty went out by herself to search once again. While searching she found a tree that looked like it has been hit. She pulled on the side of the road and walked over to look over the edge and there was 'Steve' at the bottom of the hill laying face down in a pool of blood his truck and random parts scattered don the side of the hill.
It has been really hard to process and really wrap my head around all of this. I don't think it has really set in for most of us, other than Misty. Misty once again will be haunted for the rest of her life. She stood at the top of the road and looked down in the valley and saw her friend ;Steve' laying among the wreckage that was once his truck. He was face down, and surrounded by blood, she could tell by looking at him from afar that he was gone. She feels grief stricken, she feels that perhaps she should have made her way down the hill and attempted to hold him until someone arrived - she said she could not bring her self to go down the hill because she knew he was dead, she was frozen and frantically started calling 911 for an ambulance. This was the beginning of my Sunday.
I made it to my sisters house, I drove her back to the crash site and climbed down the valley to help gather whatever personal items we could find. It was awful, truck parts were everywhere, and then I was standing next to a pool a blood. WHAT THE HELL!!
I was not close to these people, they were acquaintances and very close to my sister and her family. Please keep Angie's, my sister and her family in your prayers, they will need all of the warm thoughts and prayers you can muster.

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Getting older.....



Lance is the youngest of 6 children, his next sibling is 11 years older than him - his oldest sibling is 25 years older than him. He is the youngest by far, his childhood memories are completely different than those of his siblings. They grew up with young struggling parents, where as he was born when his mother was 40. By the time he entered their live they had outgrown some of the everyday struggles, and were able to shower him with gifts, love and affection. His siblings do not have such happy memories.



His siblings have enjoyed watching Lance grow up, he is treated more like one of their children than their brother. They were so happy when he graduated high school, got his first real job and then once he got married. All of his sisters had to come and visit us once Lance 'got his first home'.


I found this strange, our home is not big and/or special, it is a home within our means and it is kid friendly. But his sisters arrived and they just 'gushed' about it. My siblings on the other hand, gave me any their left over furniture so we could attempt to fill the house.

Don't get me wrong, Lance's siblings are great, and they have welcomed me with open arms. They enjoy my kids and stay in constant contact with us...I am lucky to have such great in-laws.

But to watch them gush over him, makes me want to puke - ha! His mother practically does cart-wheels when he comes to visit, and his father is filled with joy just to see us pull up in the parking lot. He has been the privileged child, and a potential brat (at times).


How he ever married me (the middle child), is still a mystery. There are times when I find his wants / needs ridiculous. There are times when I have to put my foot down and tell him that we cannot spend this money, because we are saving for something else. This is prob a result of growing up differently. He never had to share his food, toys and or attention. I on the other had have never known what it was like not to share. So when the kids eat off my plate or want to sit in my lap while we watch tv or share my bed - it seems natural. My sister and I shared a room until I was 12, and I grew up in a house with privacy was minimal.

Lance and I struggle at times to work thru certain situations as a result of our childhood.

However, him having sisters and older parents helped him develop a sense of softness. He has a much better listening skills than I ever have. Plus, he has the ability to be self entertained, I on the other hand find myself at a loss if I am alone for too long.


I think part of his attraction to me was my sense of family (among other things). There is not one holiday when we don't get together, not one birthday we don't celebrate..and if there is a lag in reasons to celebrate, then my family makes one up and have a bbq just to get everyone together.

Lance's parents got divorced when he was 11 or 12, and he was devastated. His siblings were gone and he was left in a home not understanding what was going on. At the age of 15 he moved to my home town to live with his dad. He traveled all the way from El Paso Texas to live in small farm town MO.

In his first day of school he sat in the principals' office waiting to be signed in and I was in the 6th grade heading out to recess. I walked past the glass window and saw this 'new' kid sitting there. He was the cutes kids I have ever seen, plus he was a bit edgy and older. He had spiked hair (which no one had), he was tan, he was tall, he worn clothes that were not from around town and I thought he looked totally cool. Even from far away you can get a sense of softness from him, and a sense of easy-going, that just added to my 6th grade affection.

I looked at my best friend and said 'I am going to marry that man'. Of course it was 6th grade 'love' and nonsense....but something inside of told me that he was it. He was my first for alot of things, love, sex, heart-break and stability. I feel as if we truly have come full circle. He is my best friend and like friends we fight, and don't always get along. We truly enjoy each other company, and grow closer to each other as we get older. I think we are both surprise at how much we truly enjoy our current life. I personally am surprised at how well things have turned out...we really did have potential to live on welfare, in a trailer with 8 kids. We had potential to struggle with meth habits and bad friends and bad teeth. We had potential to go no-where together.

But somehow we managed to grow-up find ourselves and contribute to society. Who knew?



We dated all thru high-school, we were sweethearts..I remember when he got his drivers license, when we went to prom. And now he turns 35....now I look at him and see hits of gray hair and wrinkles. Where did the time go? I see him light up with joy when our children enter the room, I catch his glance from across the room and I am filled with a sense of love, I see him loving his life with no regrets. Happy 35th Birthday from you wife with love.....I am looking forward to another 35 years.





Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Sunny side up

So this weekend Lance and I worked at the Arnold Eagles Lodge in honor of Wilson C. Clay - a 4 yr old kid that has recently been diagnosed with Leukemia. The benefit raised an amazing $26,000 - wow! It started out really small, then before we knew it the donations starting flowing in and it became HUGE. Well, huge in terms of anything I could have put together.
They had alot of things donated such as, 4-wheelers, cruises (2), cardinals tickets, autograph baseballs, footballs, booze, Avon, Mary Kay, gift cards from a lot of local rest., and several people made personal donations.
I have not personally met Wilson, nor had I met his parents before that night. But his Aunt keeps my kids (she is our sitter), and we came out to support her and her family. Lance and I sat there in amazement at the 'good' in people.
We all have alot going on, we all have alot of issues, and alot of strain in our daily lives. And somehow among it all 'we' found a way to rally around this family. It was amazing to be a part of, the family was more than grateful, they were overwhelmed by the support of strangers. The money raised will put a small dent in the mounting medical bills, and for one night the parents were able to put their stress aside.
Lance and I have a great time, working this benefit, mingling with people and feeling good about being able to help a family in need.

Lance turns 35 tomorrow, we are going to go to dinner tonight with the kids in an effort help him celebrate. That should be interesting - for the most part I have banned Pyper from going into public. She is banned for two reasons,
1) She is two and terrible!
2) She has issues these days with keeping her clothes on - mainly her shirt. ugh.

Rylan has managed to get thru his principal issue intact. He moved seats, and said yesterday that him and Trevor were 'speaking' again. The principal has not called, nor do I expect a call anytime soon. Rylan continues to thrive in school, and is looking forward to summer. He is signing up for football. Dear god, football at 7...that seems really early to me.
I didn't mind soccer, all he did was run around. But football makes my head hurt, they are expected to be really physical and I am not sure how i will react to that.
Let me just tell you, as he played soccer, I personally ran up and down the field (w/ Pyper in tow) watching Rylan. I fear I may be on the field trying to baby him everytime someone 'hits' him. * Lance told me I should just stay home. (ha!).

I am still taking my med's and feeling better with each day. I am SO glad the sun has decided to show up for a bit. The weekend was great for my attitude. The kids and I are walking every night we can. Actually , Rylan rides his bike and Pyper spends most of her time being carried by me. I am so glad to be back outside and walking again....I really did miss it.

Tomorrow I will post about Dear Hubby turning 35...who knows what that will be like, so stay tuned. He got baseball tickets three weeks ago as an early bday present - he is going to 4 games this year, including the Mets game. It is exactly what he wanted, and now I am thru with Bdays for a while - whew.

Friday, April 4, 2008

Principal -update:

I am not sure where to start......um.
As you know I called and spoke with the principal yesterday, and 'we' were to speak with Rylan once I got home from work.
I get home and Rylan is in the shower. I peek in and ask him how his day was...
He is sniffling and manages to say 'fine'. I leave it at that.
He gets out, makes his way into the living room - where I am playing with Pyper and his dad is sitting the chair. I look at him and ask ' anything you want to tell us, about today?'
That was all it took he started sobbing, crying and was barely coherent 'I was sent to the principals office today mom.'
Me ' Yes, I know I spoke with the principal today.'
He looks stunned ' mom, I didn't mean to hurt Trevor...we play all the time. And now he won't be my friend.'
Me 'Did you hit him?'
Rylan ' yes, we were trading punches.'
Me ' trading punches, do you do that alot?'
Rylan ' yeah all the time'.
Me ' did he tell you that you hurt him?'
Rylan 'no. plus Kyle was also playing with us.
*Apparently there are three first graders in one seat on the bus - Rylan, Trevor and Kyle. Trevor is the youngest and smallest.
The principal indicated that she was going to remove Trevor from the seat and separate the other boys with different seat mates.
What a novel idea.
We spoke with Rylan about keeping our hands and feet to ourselves, listening to people and knowing when to stop. Last night he wrote (himself) a letter to Trevor telling him that he was sorry. Between Rylan having to see the principal, having to speak with us and write the letter - I think he has been thru enough.
He was still very upset this morning, wouldn't finish his breakfast and had some anxiety over riding the bus. I hugged him and told him, 'as long as you tell the truth, and remember the rules we discussed. You will be fine.' His little emotions are running high.
I called the principal this morning to let her know we spoke with Rylan, and informed her not to hesitate to contact us directly should something else occur. I let her know we are engaged parents and are willing to go the extra mile if necessary.
We both agreed that this incident was a result of horseplay that got out of hand, and she has no concerns about Rylan. (whew!).
*You should have seen him last night, so very upset about it all. Upset to think he had to see the Principal, upset to think Trevor wouldn't be his friend....

I sat there speaking with him (in my parent voice), and thought quietly to myself how it seemed to me that he had enough guilt and emotions about the situation that he had really beaten himself up. There really is no reason for us to discipline him, he didn't do anything terribly wrong. I believe him having to see the principal and having to tell us the story and write the I am sorry letter was discipline enough for this incident.

So there is my first phone meeting with the principal. In the whole scope of things it could have been worse.

Part of me really wishes the principal would call the other parents and let them know she spoke with us and that we are addressing the situation. If I put myself in their shoes, I would want to know that the other set of parents at least acknowledged the situation and were willing to address it. I asked the Principal if 'we' should speak with the other set of parents, and she said 'no'. I hope that was the right decision. I don't know who the parents are, where they live or what they think. I can imagine that they don't think to highly of the mo-hawk kid that seems to be 'mean' to their son on the bus. I hope they understand that it was a situation of typical horseplay between first graders that apparently got out of hand.

I was surprised to know that this is typical behavior for these boys on the bus. But the other kids, (the babysitters two children) confirmed that Rylan and Trevor play like 'that' all the time, and that Rylan has not done anything out of the ordinary.
So this morning prior to dropping him off, he was teary eyed and I hugged him he looked up at me and said 'mom, I think I will just find a new seat today'. I smiled back and said 'that might be a good idea. And don't forget to give Trevor his not telling him you are sorry.'

This weekend Lance and I are attending a Leukima benefit - for a 4 year old boy http://wilsonclay.eventsbot.com/. Actually, we are working at the benefit. It is for a great cause and should be a good time, Lance and I are managing the door - ha!

Thursday, April 3, 2008

What?

I have lunch with Lance today, he is off work and taking care of Pyper. No one is sick, the sitter needed off, she is holding a benefit this weekend and has a few lose ends to wrap up. No big deal.

During lunch today I asked Lance how Pyper was when they dropped Rylan off at school. He said as normal ' she cried, because she wanted to go too'.
The he looks really serious. 'Michelle, the principal pulled me aside and said she needed to speak with us about Rylan'.
I look at Lance sidways....I am thinking, 'rylan, not rylan...this is strange.'
Lance continues' apparently another parent called the school to complain about Rylan. Rylan is apparently playing too rough with another kid on the bus. He is apparently, hitting this kid in the balls /cods (that is what we call them) and twisting this kids arm.'
I am shocked, and speechless...'what?' Is about all I can manage.
I am imagining myself being the parent of a child that comes home and hears about how another child is treating him. I am angry, and saddened to think that Rylan 'could' be acting this way.
I look over at Lance and ask ' what are we going to do?'
Lance ' I am going to talk with him once he gets home. The principal said she too was going to speak with Rylan to see what was going on.'
I am reeling..Rylan, really. This does not really sound like him. Well, it sort of sounds like him, if he was horsing around with the other kids. But I cannot imagine him not stopping when the other kids asked him to stop.
I am not one of those parents who thinks my child can do no wrong. I just am not sure what the complete circumstances are at the moment.
As Lance drops me off after lunch, I glance over and state ' I am really upset about the Rylan, thing. We may need to dig deeper, and if it is true then he will go to this kids house and apologize and we need to tell the parents we are also sorry. '
Once i got back to my desk, I left a message for the principal. I want to know the specifics. There are times when Lances delivers the message that things get lost in translation. I think something must have happened, why else would a parent call?
This evening should be interesting....our first 'talk' with our son. We will discuss keeping our hands to ourselves, hurting other people, and when to take it all down a notch. He has a tendency to get ramped up and rowdy and is not ready to quit when everyone else is.
I pray there is not more to this, but I am open to finding the truth - whatever it is.
ugh.....

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Party Photos and other stuff.

Rylan turned 7 on Sunday. He got his spring mo-hawk on Saturday - per the promise that I made over Christmas. He had a great time at BounceU (in South County). We had kids, pizza, soda and cake.



You can see Pyper enjoying the pizza, she too had a great time. She luvs a party.

*Here is a photo of My mother (red coat) my sister (eyes closed), Grant my sisters youngest son. In the back round is my cousin Joey, Josh, and Lance with Pyper.

Here is a photo the KIDS that came to help us celeberate. Thank you for making the day really special for Rylan.
*Note: this is my 96th post (who knew I had so much to say?). As an update, I am still taking my medicine and getting a grip on it all. Thank you for the out-pour of concern. Reality sucks at times, but we are taking it in stride.
Congrats to my cousin Joey - he just found out he is having baby #2. Sending warm thoughts and prayers your way.

Kids

Kids
Nieces & Nephews and Kids...