If you stand for nothing, you will fall for anything.

So last night the fever finally broke. She was fever free to most of the night and into the morning- yeah!!! She is snotty, and icky - but we are giving her an over the counter medicine for that. Did I mention that the medicine is gross, and makes her gag. Yeap, it gags her and then she pukes. NICE (not). So last night I give her the medicine at 8pm, give her a milk cup and rocked her to sleep. I go to lay her in her bed, she has a coughing fit and puckes right in the middle of her bed. I am once again changing sheets, pillow cases, and Pj's. Yuck, yuck, yuck! *Did I mention that once i changed everything I just placed her in my bed. We will be starting from square one next week. But on the bright side, the fever is gone. Another bright side, hubby took off today to stay at home with her. Out of the blue, without being prompted -I wonder what he wants.....! So today Lance and Pyper are having a culinary affair, Lance is cooking Gumbo and Clam Chowder for the weekend. Rylan is looki

Well it is hump day, and the week has been from hell. Sunday Pyper and Lance were REALLY sick. Both ended up staying home Monday, therefore I made it to work. Pyper is not any better. Here fever yesterday was 103.6 - I could have cried. That is scary and dangerous. I took her to the doctor and he said she has rosieollia (sp), basically a virus. A virus that causes a small rash (check), a high fever (check), and dry patchy skin (check). He indicated this should last 4 to 7 days. Yesterday was day 4 and today is day 5 - this morning she had 102.1 fever. Still way to high for a two year old. My sassy two year old is down and out, she is not eating. Actually she has not eaten anything to speak of in three days. I am worried and sick to my stomach over it all. Luckily she IS drinking. She is drinking alot, water, juice, milk (when she does not have a fever). I continue to keep her close, and that means in my bed, so I can wake her up every 4 hrs to give her the much needed dr

So I guess it was best that we did not go to the country this weekend. Pyper ended up sick on Saturday (late) afternoon. She has gotten progressively worse, and on top of it Lance has gotten it too. Pyper has a fever that I cannot seem to break, luckily she is not puking, she is drinking, but not eating. I took her to the Walgreen's clinic yesterday, just to make sure I was not missing anything. I am giving her Tylenol & Motrin (piggy-back), and mucinx. Upon arrival at the clinic I found out they don't take my husbands insurance, therefore it would have been cheaper to go to the urgent care. Apparently some insurance carriers do not recognize a nurse practicanor. ugh. *But we were already in the office, and Pyper looked SO bad, so we will just pay the bill. A bill that diagnoses a virus, apparently a virus the could last 4 to 7 days. They did swab her for streep throat, it came back negative. By mid-afternoon I had Lance and Pyper looking sickly, and feeling like

So the weekend is 'almost' here. Lance and Rylan are headed to the country tonight to see Lance's dad. I have opted to stay home with Pyper. We will stay home for a few reasons. 1) Pyper is still not sleeping all night, and we have to share a bed with her at Grandpa's house. 2) Since grandpa lost his lovely wife this past November, he is less tolerant of my screaming two year old. Actually, I think there are times he wants her to just go away. 3) I don't feel like packing to go, I have housework and laundry calling my name. I 'think' Lance & Rylan will leave this evening, therefore they will be gone two nights. I will try to persuade them to stay tonight - I secretly hate to sleep alone. Sunday we are planning on attending the dog parade http://www.mardigrasinc.com/2008Events/Beggin-Strips-Barkus-Pet-Parade.aspx in Soulard. Weather permitting* we go every year. We won't have our own dog this year, but it is a blast to watch all of the animals (most

I get home last night around 5pm to see Rylan before he leaves for the hospital (his appt is at 7pm). Our faces meet and he begins crying. He says 'Mom, I don't want to go, I am scared'. My heart drops. I reassure him that this will be simple and easy. Plus he can bring a pillow, a movie and his Monster truck. He seems distracted for the moment getting his additional items. Around 6pm Lance loads up to get ready to go. Rylan is hesitant. I hug him, give him a reassuring kiss and send him on his way. He heads to the garage, less than one minute later he is back inside, crying. I look at him, he says' Mom, I don't want to go....' I promise him it is just one night, I show him yesterdays blog, with the girl hooked up and reassure him it will be fine. He will look like a robot, he can tell his friends, it will be cool. He goes back to the car, semi comforted. I call the hospital at 8pm, because no one has called me. sidebarr-*I am at home WAITING for a call. Duh. La

Tonight my son and his father will pack up and head to Children's Hospital for a sleep test. Rylan has sleep apnea, from his cleft. I have put this test off for as long as possible. It has been easier for me not to think about hospitals and surgery. During Rylan's first 13 mths of life he had 3 surgeries the longest one lasting 4 plus hours. His first surgery was at 8 weeks old and I am thankful we live in an area that has a Children's hospital, but freaked out by the thought of subjecting my child to ongoing surgeries. Rylan before any surgery..... Rylan Today!! It is a fact the Rylan will have several more surgeries through out his life time, this we know. But the last few years we have had some down time, and it has been nice. The first two surgeries I watched as the orderlies took my son from my arms, he screamed and cried as they walked thru the double doors and into the surgery room. The last few surgeries I have opted to actually take him back and hold him wh

Would someone PLEASE turn up the heat. I was friggn ' cold this weekend. The cold weather led us to hibernate inside our little home. Our home felt even smaller once my sisters 4 kids joined us for the night. Friday night I went out around 8pm and met up with my sister for some much needed down time. This 'bad' mood has been lingering around me for the last three weeks, I call it 'winter'. So in an effort find my happy place I went out. It is pretty easy to locate your happy place when drinks are involved. I danced, I laughed, I smiled and surrounded my self with strangers who didn't know me from Eve. Ahh , good times. This good time was brought to a complete hault once I walked thru the threshold of my house. I come bee- poping in around 1am only to find Lance and Pyper in the rocking chair. Buzz Kill!~ Pyper leaps out of her fathers lap and cries until she locates my leg. Yeah, the leg that smells like the bar I was just at. Yeah, the leg that is holding

Friday, and Starbucks that seems to be the highlight of my day. Last night Pyper did really well sleeping, but her brother seemed to have gotten chocked up and pucked in his bed at 3am. Yeah , right smack in the middle of his bed. I have bat ears in the middle of the night, I sleep with one eye open and one ear to the floor. I hear Rylan gasping, which is semi normal due to his sleep apnea then suddenly I hear a gagging sound. I leap out of bed *I should wear a cape to bed - I swear I could jump tall buildings . I leap out of bed and race to reach the child, now projecting his dinner into the middle of his bed. OMG . I turn around and go back to bed * no, not to lay back down; but to wake up Lance. I push Lance once, twice and by time number three I am shoving him. 'wake up - Rylan is puking and I need your help'. I rush back to Rylan who is whimpering and whining at this point. Lance lags behind, scratching his butt and trying to become oriented . I help Rylan down fro

Okay so last night was IT , I lost it. I yelled and screamed until I thought I was going to cry, but alias no tears would come -instead I just got angry. Anger seems to my only mood lately, and that makes me angry (vicious cycle). I need something to give, something other than me. I have been telling lance for weeks now that I have alot of my plate at the moment. As normal he acts as if he hears me, but then continues to ignore the situation. This is his MO - if I ignore the situation then it will go away. I stay at work late last night, in lieu of the pending audit. I have to stop off to get diapers, wipes, shampoo, etc - all of those nice things that keep the household going around. You know the things no one else thinks about. If I did not buy the toilet paper, how would these people wipe their butts. And since I have kids, I don't hold them responsible. But Lance could do something other than cook. I get home late last night to find Rylan playing playstation, Pyper watching

Today is a 'me' day. I struggled all morning with whether or to stay home and take care of myself. I got up, got dressed, dressed the kids, dropped them off made it half way to work and then turned around. I know enough about myself to know when I am maxed out, and frankly, I am MAXED out. So now here I am wrapped up in my robe w/ a nice cup of coffee, and what do I hear? Nothing. I forgot what my house sounded like with no one in it. I must admit, I am a bit lonely. However I am more tired than lonely. I will pick up a little, do laundry and sleep. Pyper's sleeping cycle, or lack there of, has taken it toll on me physically and emotionally. Today is a day at home, my home with just me. I felt guilty dropping her off, knowing I could actually spend the day with her, but that was a fleeting thought once I saw how excited she was to see the other kids. The sleeping technique - making her sleep in her own bed was sabotaged over the weekend. We went to the country t

I drive home last night, and feel a sense of relief. The week is almost over, and we are all still alive. Yes, being alive does constitute as an accomplishment at my house. I apparently kill everything but my children. I don't do plants or anything else that may require attention. Domestic goddess is not on my list. My husband did NOT marry me for my domestic skills. I hate cooking, laundry, cleaning etc. I could burn water. I get the laundry done, only to have it sit on top of the washing machine (Practically begging someone to put it away). The laundry 'may' make its way upstairs, where it finds a lovely home on the guest bed. There it sits for a week while family members search thru it for miscellaneous items. The socks go in a basket, because I don't match socks. I hate socks, I buy everyone the same socks so I don't have to match them. I prefer to spend my time doing something else. I sweep and vacuum every night...because I hate to have things stick to my feet

A few things have been weighing heavy on my mind such as ; I have been struggling to get my family to attend church. I have 'found' a church that I enjoy attending http://www.hrcoc.com/ (HrCoc), it happens to be run by http://www.mamalogues.com/ father-in-law. I have been attending on/off for the last 2 1/2 years. We travel every other weekend, so I am lucky to attend once a month. This equates to approx 12 times a year. It is like pulling teeth to get my husband to attend, then my son follows suite. *Disclaimer: I am not here to shove religion down your throat....I have spent alot of years searching for a place that I liked. (Baptist, Catholic, Buddhism, Jehovah witness etc). My soul seems to rest easy here. I want for my family to go, my children to learn / love god, and receive a sense of direction. So the other night hubby and I were in bed talking about a few struggles we have encountered lately, and i brought this one up. Stating ' you really need to come with me at

I feel defeated today.... I have been trying a 'supernanny' technique. You know the one where you leave your child in their own bed when they wake-up in the middle of the night. Well we had two (fairly) successful nights of Pyper waking up, me laying her back down -soothing her back and keeping her in her bed. Rather than scooping her up and placing her in my bed between hubby and myself. Last night, well not so successful - actually it sucked! Damn this child is HARD. I was up 4 plus times and the last time lasted for 1 1/2 hrs (3 to 4:30AM). As I am up, I feel my self becoming REALLY frustrated with the situation....I pray for grace, and patience. All I seem to get is frustrated. So by 4:30 i give in and place her in my bed. Defeated!! She snuggles up next to me, begins her normal ritual of Chinese torture (hair pulling) and is asleep in no time. This morning I wake up with a bald spot (via the hair pulling) and bags under my eyes. I debate on whether or not to l

Here are a few photo's of my New Years and Christmas..... I am glad it is over. Joey & Tiffany (New Years Eve) Me & my sister (Misty) Hotel room before going out! Misty getting ready..... Rylan and his new BBgun. Angie, Lance and Misty. Pyper unwrapping gifts. Kids looking out the window waiting for Santa...... My Aunt Diana Pyper on the phone..... Kids making x-mas ordinaments. All the kids - my brothers (3), my sisters (4), my (2) - nine grandbabies at home for x-mas.