Wednesday, October 31, 2007

On the brink.....

I hate the two year old stage....I don't remember it being this damn difficult with Rylan. Mind you Rylan was a difficult child - but Pyper is beyond difficult. What to do with this CHILD. I know my mom is convinced that I 'don't have any patience's' with this child. Even the most patient person would have been pushed to their limits by now.
Pyper has two to three melt downs a day...one in the morning and possibly two in the evening. ANYTHING can set her off. Something as simple as let's put your shoes on, will set her off. And the FIT can last anywhere from 15 min to 45min. 45 minutes of a screaming child. OMG. This child screams and yells to the point that snot and drool begin draining out of her mouth. Then she proceeds to get down on the floor an bang her head. I figure the head banging is a way to let me know she is frustrated. Guess what ME Too. The last few days I have placed her in her crib during her fit. This was to save her from hurting herself. She looks like a monkey gone mad in the crib. She is all over the crib, flinging and flailing around. She holds the rail and jumps so high, I think fear she may fall out. I don't leave her....I sit on the stool next to the bed and speak to her. I tell her things such as ' it is okay to be mad' ; 'mommy loves you'; etc. Every minute or so I try to approach her to comfort her and she throws herself into the bottom of the bed, in an effort to get away. The moment i sit on the stool, she is back at the rail begging me not to leave her, and jumping around like a monkey on crack. I silently pray for patience and grace.
Once she will finally let me approach her, I scoop her up and hold her tight. I hug her close and talk gently to her. The other part of me wants to spank her for acting a fool. I don't spank her - I understand she is frustrated. So I hug her tightly and PRAY out loud.
These ordeals really send my emotions in a whirlwind. I am at a loss and feeling rather badly. Even if I sit and hold her, she gets frustrated for staying still. If I move around she gets frustrated because she is moving. WHAT TO DO? I am trying to find a way to be consistent, but I am not sure what I emotion I am fighting with her. Punishment and time out are not needed, she is having a melt-down, not being bad. I keep holding and talking to her in an effort to continue to re-assure her that things are okay. But I am not so sure things are okay. Am I missing something?
She does NOT act this way with anyone other than me. She is PO'd at me..how do I make it right, and still keep my sanity?
My options really are limited....I guess I could break down and buy a book with some suggestions. Apparently 'winging' it is not working for this child.
On top of it I have a sassy six year old. He is ALWAYS pushing his limits, talking back and not listening. I hear 'I don't like you' on a regular basis. I can tell him to get a shower and he will respond ' NO'. Guess what bubba - you don't get to tell me 'no'. I can handle 'hold on, or 'just a minute'. So last night his father spanked him. It is not normal for us to spank our children, Rylan has gotten two spankn's in his who 6 yrs - yesterday made # 2. It hurts my heart as much as it hurts Rylan's feelings.
So I have two disgruntle children, and no major plan of action. The plan is to love them, put them in bed and have a glass of wine. :)

1 comment:

Farrell said...

Michelle,
You might want to consider this book/method, as mentioned on Slacker Mom's blog.

Kids

Kids
Nieces & Nephews and Kids...