Aliens have taken my husband...

Last night was 'weird' as usual. You would think I would be use to it all by now. I did grow up with my mother - who is beyond weird at times. Perhaps I was attracted to Lance because he was more like my mother than my father (*what a creepy thought). Anyway, I am just wondering when Lance started wearing ladies underwear and being hormonal? *(he does not really wear ladies underwear - but if he did I would make him wear a thong, so he would really know what butt-floss was like).

I got side-tracked. Last night Lance was REALLY serious, and talking. Both aspects are not like him. He does not get serious about much of anything nor does he talk without being prompted. He was serious about work, more particularly his new job. Apparently with this new job is going come new responsibilities -duh!

He commented ' I just want to work Michelle, not do the paperwork too'.

My response ' too damn bad, welcome to growing up'.

Lance he looks at me his face all crooked - 'I don't mind being grown-up, but I don't want to responsibility'.

Me - ' then slack off. Do sloppy work and don't be reliable. If you don't want more work then stop working so hard.'

Lance - ' you know I cannot do that'.

Me -'Yeah, I know. So you are stuck. Suck it up and move on. Besides even if you had someone else do the paperwork you would review it. So why not just do it and not waste your time.'

Lance - 'yeah, I know.' End of our serious conversation.

We moved on to dinner, all of us are sitting around the table, and Pyper is actually sitting in her seat and eating her plate. Why is this unusual? Because, she sits next to me and normally ends up in my lap eating off her and my plate. Two days ago I refused to let her sit with me. I kept telling her ' Pyper has her own seat with her own plate.' Then I would pat the chair and motion her to sit down. She walked around the table asking everyone to pick her up. We all refused. By day two, we had a successful dinner. So I look across the table at Lance and prompt him to look at her, I have a smirk that says' LOOK'. Lance responds with ' I want another child'.

I choke on my food. Before I can cough out 'WHAT?' I can tell by the look on his face he is NOT kidding. I look at him, look around our table and say ' don't you think the gang is all here?'

He says 'no'. My mind is racing - OMG, No, this is not happening. Me ' Lance, we are almost in a position to have some resemblance of a life back, Pyper is almost 2 and Rylan is almost 7, do you REALLY want another baby?' I see him having an internal struggle - he is trying to figure out how to convince me this is a good thing. Then I continue ' we would have three kids in care, plus where would we put another kid, all of the rooms are taken.' Lance - 'you would have work harder, and we would have to move'. I 'think' he misses having a baby in the house. Not me. He loves pregnant women (esp me). I HATE to be preg. The thought of me walking (waddling) around with a child makes his eyes shine. It makes me want to gauge my eye-balls out. I tell him to think on it, and we can talk more later.

So whatever aliens have taken over my husbands brain, if you could send back my REAL husband, I would appreciate it. I prefer the quite non-talking one, becuase lately when he talks, he actually making sense and trying to be reasonable. *Note to the mothership - take my mother instead, send her back normal. ha!!! I could not resist that one. Peace out.

PS - Happy offical Bday to my sister. She kissed her 20's goodbye and is now offically 30!! I love you.

Comments

Farrell said…
I married my mother.

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